(I started this blog post a few weeks ago, but never ended up getting back to finish it… it’s relatively complete where it is… so I guess I’ll just post it unfinished [the reason I'm not going to finish it is because I don't generally do to well at trying to go back and finish old posts I started... I end up just deleting the whole thing and doing something new])
It seems like my blog posts get farther and few between as time goes on. And it seems like I keep saying that at beginning. Ah well, what can I say. I’m a lazy man.
There is so much to speak of, I don’t really know what to choose. I suppose I’ll just kind of write and see what comes out (which is what I always do, so I don’t know why I’m talking about doing it at the beginning here…).
This evening I took a walk out back in the snow covered windblown farm fields as the sun was setting. I used to take walks out back quite often, but I’m rather loathe to say I don’t know if I’ve done it even once this winter before today. I like the cold… with the windchill it was probably single digits or low teens. Somehow walking briskly through snow with my jeans and black jacket in the bitter cold makes me feel alive. Most people don’t like the cold like that I find, but somehow I enjoy it. Maybe it’s because it’s something that I can still feel very distinctly when other sense are perhaps somewhat jaded. I don’t know. The cold and the beautiful trees and sky combined really serve to connect me to God, to quiet my mind and just stop to think for a little.
I’ve been getting caught up in life and it’s complexities… plans, decisions, relationships, change, emotions… there are so many things that fill my mind and weigh me down every day. I guess I’ve always been one who’s quite against worry, and I’ve been quick so say that one shouldn’t plan, that one should control his emotions and accept changes and deal with relationships. Perhaps I was rash to think I’m above these things, but I have to keep holding that belief. I was reminded today in a very quiet way to stop and listen to God.
As I stood in a clearing outside looking through the trees at the colored sky and fading sun, I could see a stain glass window far more beautiful and impressive than anything man could ever make.